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Happiness And Success: You’ve Got To Know What Excites You

July 5th, 2010 by selfimprovementmomma

I’ve met many people who want more out of life. I chat to lots of people who feel that they need something different but they’ve no idea what that ‘different’ is. Some are simply not happy where they are – perhaps their stuck in an unloving relationship, they don’t like their job or, perhaps, they’ve simply been doing the same job for so long that they get nothing out of it anymore. Many, who take the route of personal development, want more out of life but they don’t know what that ‘more’ is.

Do you want more out of life? If you do, you must have some idea of what more means for you. There’s no point in wishing for something else without knowing what that something else might look like and feel like. To get what you want out of life, you’ve to know what you want.

In a recent conversation with a client who has been working in the same job for the last ten years, I was surprised by how she had no idea whatsoever of what she wanted to do in life. She was looking at her options from the normal narrow-minded perspective of her perceived strengths and weaknesses, her previous experience and, most chillingly, her perceived need to pay the bills. You might consider those last few words to be rather strange – bills are real, they have to be paid. But unless you’re complete idiot, you’d never do something that would leave you destitute

However, our commitments always seem to come uppermost in our minds. Recent research that suggests that the normal people are obsessed with money and fearful of not having enough of the stuff (whatever enough might be). Forget about your financial commitments – they will be more than adequately looked after if you put your heart’s desire first. I’m not suggesting that you be silly about deciding what you might like to change in your life, I’m merely suggesting that you need to view your priorities in a completely different light.

And, in setting your priorities, you need to know what would really – and I mean really, really – turn you on. What would you leap out of bed for in the morning? What would excite you so much that you wouldn’t have to work, it would be a labour of love? Ask yourself: What is my ideal life? And, most importantly from the point of view of your all-powerful subconscious mind (the part of your mind that creates your reality), what would your ideal life look like, feel like, sound like, smell like and taste like?

An unusual question? No way – the subconscious mind believes in the snapshots that it holds dearly within its inner recesses. These snapshots are not visual, they use all five senses – no surprise, you make sense of the world by using your five senses and it is through using your five senses that you were programmed to live the boring life that has you so disillusioned right now. The key is to excite your subconscious mind and a really exciting life will simply follow – oh and by the way, all the bills will be more than adequately catered for.

Change Your Life – Follow Your Inspiration

July 3rd, 2010 by selfimprovementmomma

How many good ideas have you had that you simply never did anything about? Ever noticed that many of the most successful people rose to where they are because they pursued some really simple idea – the kind of idea that you say to yourself “I could have thought of that!”?

You need to realize that the difference between normal people and these super-successful people is down to one simple thing – successful people take action, normal people don’t. The normal person prefers to resort to self-defeating useless thoughts like “I could never do something like that” or “I wouldn’t know how to go about it” or, the most common one of all “Look at what I’ve got to lose”. You’ve got to be abnormal to be a success. There’s nothing to lose except, maybe, the normal humdrum mundane ordinary life and that inner sinking feeling that your life will never be anything other than “not too bad”.

We all know plenty of people who simply don’t have the guts to listen to their instinct and consequently will never live the dream. One long-lost friend springs to mind. He was never sure if he could earn enough money (whatever enough is) if he were to do what really turned him on. And he never found out – he succumbed to cancer in his thirties having settled for the predictable and safe option of doing more of the same with his life.

His time ran out – quicker than most. But that should confirm in your own mind that time is running out for you and I as you read these words. You’ve probably already had opportunities in you life that required bold decisions and you didn’t take them. You’d be breaking the habit of taking the easy option, the one that guarantees more of the same. However, abnormally successful people don’t see their actions as bold or courageous – they simply see it as something that they’ve got to do.

So what is it that you have to do in your life? What is it that you really want to do? And, if you did it, you know, you’d find that you’d never have to work another day in your life because it would be a labour of love. And a labour of love is done extraordinarily and effortlessly. If you’re doing what really turns you on you simply cannot but succeed.

So listen to your inspiration – pay attention to the things that spring to mind that are adventurous and exciting. You’ve got to understand that what’s normal is simply a set of dos and don’ts agreed upon by normal people who, psychology confirms, are crazy. The normal person’s subconscious controls them – not the other way around. It’s that out of control subconscious that tells you “No you can’t” when, in fact you can achieve anything that really excites you, anything in which you truly believe.

7 Goal Setting Steps

June 27th, 2010 by amauser

7 Goal setting Steps

 

The three keys to living without limits have always been the same. They are clarity, competence, and concentration. Goal setting will help you live without limits. Learning how to set goals is an art. Learn why setting goals is a necessity. Here are 7 Must-have conditions to set goals.

 

1. State your goal in positive terms.

People often set a goal in terms of what they don’t want! “I don’t want to smoke, to be angry…” It’s “what I want to do or want to be” See the difference? Hear the nuance? Are you ready to state positively every goal you want to achieve?

 

2. Make sure the goal can be self-initiated and maintained.

The goal doesn’t depend on the attitude of your neighbor, on the behavior of your wife or family. The success of your goal must depend on you, and you alone.

 

3. Your goal must be sensory specific.

Here comes the importance of clarity. The clearer the picture, the more compelling and the more attractive it is, the greater the drive to reach your final destination. Act as if the goal is already achieved. Make a very clear image, in rich details, and you will be so enthusiastic that you will automatically attract the solution.

 

4. State the context of the goal.

“Where and when will my goal be achieved?” The answer can be obvious for some goals but not at all for others. Try to be as specific as possible.

 

5. Run a Quality Control check on the goal to ensure balance in all areas of your home/work life.

Above all, you don’t want to lose your balance. When you run this ‘Quality Control Check”, you play a win-win strategy. Everything is one system and the whole system must win. You will find peace of mind in knowing that you are in harmony with the system. Step back and look at all areas of your life. Is your goal worth it?

 

6. State the resources needed to achieve the goal: what is the price to pay?

There is always a price to pay, for everything. There is always some kind of sacrifice to make when you set a worthy goal. In this step, you will define all that you will need, in terms of time, money and energy.

 

7. State the value and the consistency of the goal.

Why do I want to reach this goal? Why is it important to me? Is this goal in harmony with my vision, beliefs and values? Answer these questions. If you don’t seem to be satisfied with the answers, maybe you should change your goal. Set a new goal until you feel it is in harmony with your passion, vision or mission.

 

When you properly set a goal with this model, two important things occur. First, you are in total harmony with your vision, belief and value systems because your entire “You” agrees and offers no resistance. Second, you are programmed to succeed. Indeed, your very (whole) neurology and physiology are both instructed to drive you towards obtaining your desired goal. You’re totally focused.

 

Again, the three keys to living without limits have always been the same. They are clarity, competence, and concentration. When you set crystal clear goals, and you respect the 7 must-have conditions, you can literally live without limits, can’t you?

 

 

 

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Personal Development: Believe And Achieve

June 26th, 2010 by selfimprovementmomma

How would you feel about the proposition that you can achieve anything – absolutely anything – that you believe in? Well, that’s what you’re actually doing at the moment – you’re living the life that you believe you can live. Psychology tells us that we perceive only what we expect to perceive and experience only what we expect to experience. Unfortunately, as a result of our socialisation into a normal world and upbringing by normal parents, we have normal expectations and these normal expectations are way off the mark of where we could set our sights.

Psychological research also tells us that our lives are dictated by our subconscious mind’s view of the world. We learn our ideas of how the world works, who we are, what our strengths and weaknesses, our own self image during our formative years. These perceptions, which over time gradually become deeply held beliefs are stored in the deep recesses of our subconscious and, in as adults, when faced with a situation in which we have to take action, our actions will be dictated not be what is actually happening but by what we perceive as happening, based on our deeply held beliefs. In this way, normal people are cannot see opportunity when it stares them in the eye, because it is contrary to their normal expectations.

The upshot of all this is that our subconscious perceptions, learned during our childhood, become our beliefs. These drive our expectations and our behaviour and, as a result, our beliefs create our lives. Basically, you achieve what you believe. Or put in an even more factual manner, normal people live down to their expectations.

You have to give yourself new beliefs – you have to believe that you can achieve the things that your heart desires. You have to be able to make a massive impression on your subconscious mind to enable it focus on what you want to achieve to the extent that it believes that it is part and parcel of and a logical step up from your current life. Believing is not wishing hoping and wanting, believing is seeing, feeling, hearing smelling and tasting. Your only interface with the outside world is your five senses. They are what you used to form your views of yourself and life in general during your childhood years. As adults, we pay little attention to those senses, preferring to use what we learned in our formative years to make sense of the present moment – and, in the process, make nonsense of it!

You’ve got to explain to your subconscious mind what it would be like to achieve your goal. It has to see it, feel it, hear it, smell it and taste it as if you already have it. You can make an enormous impression on your subconscious mind by handwriting what it is like to experience the outcome, as if you’re there already, using all five senses, writing in the present tense. But – and this is a big but – be careful what you wish for, for a focused mind will set about bringing about what it believes to be the life that you live – remember, that’s what its’ doing already.

Self Improvement Books – Playing The Game Of Life

June 17th, 2010 by selfimprovementmomma

Specific skills need to be cultivated to achieve our goals. If we are too over confident, defeat can cripple us when we fail to achieve immediately. This is often because the person has no understanding of the meaning, purpose, or intentions of their lives.

We’ll speak initially about qualities that we may be unaware of that can help us, and of emotions that might be getting in our way. We can then work out what it is we need to work on and what type of self improvement book we may need. Knowing which of our qualities are in need of improvement helps us to make a start on the effective goal setting that will help us fix it.

Ask Questions: being curious or inquisitive is a life skill you should never suppress. When a person is curious, they inquire when questions require answers. Go as deep into the topic as you can and fully understand the things you do. If people think you are too nosy or ask too many questions assess whether your questions are appropriate. Is it your business? If it is, continue to be curious, it’s your life! Learning new things is a prime goal. Back off if people won’t help and learn from books. The Law of Attraction is only one aspect of self improvement books, many more actually focus on specific life skills that need to be developed. Perhaps you are too aggressive and lack self-control, you may need to read a self improvement book on anger management.There are self improvement books for a wide variety of categories.

Focus your attention. Write down focal points to centre your interest. Purpose and meaning makes it easier to focus. Focusing helps you to capture opportunities and act on them. Read about the 80:20 rule, it suggests you should focus on the 20% that is important as the other 80% has little value. Effective people are capable of focusing on completing one thing at a time. Flitting between tasks and completing nothing is ineffective, even though you work just as hard doing it.

Time management self improvement books often recommend you also learn to meditate.

Always be willing. If you are defeated before you start, how can you ever win? People who are willing to face each new challenge confront problems and solve them. Facing fears about moving from comfort zones can actually help to decrease anxiety. Being willing to change defeatist or negative thoughts means you can just get on with it and get things done. You may not be certain to succeed but move forward anyway, with as much enthusiasm as you can muster.

Look for self improvement books on positive mental attitudes or removing negative thinking.

Be Organized: The ability to organize is a great skill that helps to set your goals. Being organized means you can put your goals in order, by systematizing, arranging, and sorting them out. The process is not just about planning, its also about self-knowledge. Sort out your goals so you can plan the steps to achieve them. Prioritize essential goals and tackle them first. Some people set the steps for their goals in time frames of daily, weekly, monthly, yearly and 5 yearly. Self improvement books on life planning and setting and achieving goals detail this skill.

Getting it done now is motivation, leaving it till tomorrow is procrastination. There is no need to be a workaholic. When you are fresh and energetic it is time to act. Don’t stress yourself out trying to achieve too much. Workaholics neglect the people who are important to them and may find that achieving their goals loses them something far more important, their family. Always take time out for people. Increasing your income is the only way to achieve many financial goals you may have. If procrastination is a genuine problem – your first goal is to solve this. Self improvement books about motivation and making things happen are useful tools only if you follow their guidance. There are also some great self hypnosis CDs available on motivation and overcoming procrastination.

Read a self improvement book. It can mean the difference between achieving something you really desire or just endlessly letting things happen to you.

Achieving something you really desire brings great joy and excitement. People can be happy and content with lives that have not gone the way they hoped. People can achieve their goals and be miserable. Neither misery or happiness is the goal or the achievement, these emotions depend on other factors. Isn’t that rush of elation worth more than anything else in the world? When setting your goals, put joy at the top of the list, it will help you evaluate your other choices. Reach out for your hearts desire and if you need to read a book to achieve it, go read a book.

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Change Your Life – Waiting For Something To Happen?

June 9th, 2010 by selfimprovementmomma

Most people are going through each day wishing, wanting, hoping or waiting for something to happen. “I wish I could just get that lucky break.” “I hope that tomorrow will be better.” “I want to win the Lottery!” Unfortunately, what most people don’t realize is that nothing “just happens” in life – you have to do what you have to do yourself to get the party started. To make matters worse, there are far too many self-help books out there that give the impression that, to get abundant success, all you have to do is believe. And, as a result, I’ve met far too many people over the years who have convinced themselves that they believe in some great outcome and, having convinced themselves, they now believe that all they have to do is sit back and wait for it to happen. That’s the same as believing that you’re going to win the Lottery but believing that you don’t need a ticket!

You’re the one who makes things happen in your life – only you can change your life. You’ve got to get up of your ass and start doing the brave and courageous things that the normal person wouldn’t dream of doing – that’s why they’re normal, not-too-bad, not-too-uncomfortable on the trudging sorry-go-round of their ordinary everyday lives. And this is also the reason why highly successful people are highly successful – they do what has to be done, taken the brave and courageous decisions, put their heart and soul into getting what they want out of life.

Of course, there’s nothing brave or courageous about doing something that will lead you towards the life that you really want – what would be viewed as courage or bravery by the normal poor soul is simply the obvious and logical thing to do for those who believe and are driven to succeed. But where will you start? Well, for starters – and this is pretty damn obvious – if you want something different to happen in your life, you’re going to have to do something different. Not necessarily outlandishly different – start with something small, you’ll be overwhelmed where it will take you. By small, I mean something as ridiculously insignificant as brushing your teeth with the other hand! Yeah, you heard me – you’ve read that sentence correctly! Doing something this small in a non-routine way will break the habit of an adult lifetime of doing all routine things automatically. In breaking little habits, you re-set your mind to take a totally different view of absolutely everything that’s happening – you’ll start seeing opportunities that were there already – you just couldn’t see them.

On the other hand, what if you’ve already done something brave or courageous and it failed? Didn’t you know – only losers quit! Statistics show that the most successful people in every walk of life, take failure in their stride, see failure as another opportunity to try again. After all, if you really want your life to change, you’re not going to quit that easily, are you?